…my spiritual gifts do not seem to include the gift of solar spirituality. Instead, I have been given the gift of lunar spirituality, in which the divine light available to me waxes and wanes with the season.
I love the week after Easter probably more than Easter weekend itself, which could sound dangerously sacrilegious to some of you, but hear me out. Holy Week is a commemoration of victory for our Lord and Savior, and as a result, Easter Sunday is a culmination of this victory that always seems a bit more joyous than most Sundays. Children are like 3 times more adorable than usual in all of those pastels, candy is everywhere, bluebonnets are like magical portrait backgrounds from God, the sun seems brighter, or even if its raining its not a dreary rain, it’s a refreshing rain–a rain that brings new life. Bunnies are relevant… I could go on. My point is that after Easter an atmosphere of bliss, contentment, and sweetness seems to fill the air, and I just love that feeling.
I have learned a lot of things this past year, about people and myself, and it has been a seriously rough journey at times. Barbra Brown Taylor wrote a book entitled Learning to Live in the Dark, and I quote a sentence from her book above. I like this quote because it epitomizes things that I have been trying to describe about my faith for a very long time. Throughout this year of seemingly dichotomous seasons, I have felt God’s divine light wax and wane into my life, and for a long time the idea that I may not have a perfect faith base scared me. It scared me to think that I could have stark seasons of apathy and doubt towards God as well as seasons of joy, praise, and serious connection to Him. But as this Holy Week comes to an end, I find an uncharacteristic peace. A peace regarding my insecurities about the inevitability of dark patches both in life and in my heart. A peace with chapters in my life that ended this last year, or even were abruptly closed. A spirit of peace and gratitude in light of the beautiful moments and people that found their way to me when I desperately needed them this year, and a peace with looming uncertainties.
Jesus’ resurrection was a new beginning for humanity, and the end of Holy Week, especially this year, marks a new chapter in my life as well, a season of healing and light–a spring.